If socializing in a party setting doesn’t come easily to you, you still have options other than staying home – options which include being yourself.
To cerebrate means to use the mind, to think or to think about. Rather than psyching yourself up to be a party animal, consider musing your way through the festivities.
You may find that answering the questions below as you take in the party scene inspires you to take action. (Remember that bathrooms can be oases of privacy where you can collect yourself and review your list.)
Pay attention when you find moments of joy or serenity or intrigue or connection during a party. You’ll only have fun if you do it your way, so take the time to figure out what your way looks like.
- Why am I here?
- Is anyone actually laughing at me?
- Can I stop focusing on what people think of me and instead focus on what I think of them?
- Where can I park for a while that’s on the edge of the hullabaloo?
- Who’s here that I already know I like?
- Who would I like to know? Why?
- Who seems truly comfortable in this setting? Why?
- Who seems comfortable being quiet?
- Who’s setting the tone of this party?
- What would I really like to know about each person here?
- What do I want to know about the person sitting next to me?
- Who seems sensitive?
- Who seems nervous?
- Am I breathing?
- Am I too cold or too warm?
- What response do I get when I ask someone what I really want to know about them?
- Is there someone here who seems more sensitive than I am?
- What can I nibble on or sip so I have something to do with my hands?
- What if I asked the shyest person here what interests them?
- What do I like about this setting? Decor? Food? Entertainment?
- If I stay and please myself, what does that look like?
- Is there someone here I’m trying to impress? Why?
- Who here knows me the best?
- Who’s trying too hard?
- Who seems gifted at putting others at ease? How do they do it?
- Who would I most like to get to know better? Why?
- Who’s taking this opportunity to regress?
- Who remains composed under pressure?
- Are the hosts helping or hindering the party?
- Who seems drawn to my calm, self-possessed stillness?
Related reading: How to Mingle at a Party | Tips for the Timid,
Pep Talk | Dance, Stay Afloat When They’re Rocking Your Boat
2 Comments
Grace! What a great guidence list! This is useful all year, not just for NY Eve parties — you put a *lot* of thought and energy into this and it certainly shows — thank you!
And Happy New Year!
Lovely, and as Jo said, it’s a perpetually useful list!